It has come to my notice that y’all are now on this crazy chase for this thing they call money. Even to the extent that y’all are beginning to harbour unnecessary stress and worry. Congratulations on clicking this post, because I’m sure at the end, you’ll develop the well-needed habit of being kind to yourself.
If you’re sincere to yourself, you’ll agree that most times, external circumstances that make us the way we are. Should we talk about the burden of social media?—only a few days ago, DJ Cuppy literally shut down Nigeria because of a luxury car.
Or is it pressure from family? Most men will know what I’m talking about. When you know you have responsibilities ahead, no one will tell you to sit tight. I’m not even counting societal and peer pressure. The slogan everywhere is Hustle o! And so, day by day, we hassle and stress and worry. I’m here to tell you what no one has probably ever told you—Be Kind to Yourself.
You’d understand better with these tips.
1. Believe in Yourself.
I said what I said. Part of being kind to yourself is believing that you can do it, believing in your abilities and in your judgement. Stray thoughts will surely come,
“Will I ever become successful?” “What does the future hold for me?” “When will I make my parents really proud?” And so on and so forth.
Reality check! Your parents are already proud of you. You didn’t have to buy them a house before they started loving you. Whether you buy a house or not, their love cannot decrease or increase any further—just like the love of God.
A friend told me recently, “You will not and cannot know the future, but you have someone who is All-Knowing.” Relax, and take it up in prayer.
2. Remind Yourself of Your Good Qualities.
Maybe you’re a bit stumpy on the legs, but you have long, lustrous hair. So what? You’re not good at math, but you’re great at sports. Maybe you have a tendency to be over-reactive, but you also have a great sense of humour. Nobody has it all, my dear.
So, cut yourself some slack and always remind yourself of your good qualities.
3. Forgive Yourself.
Look, we all mess up. We’re humans, and it’s inevitable. According to this answer on Quora,
- Maybe you did something in the past that you’re not proud of.
- Perhaps you failed to stand up for yourself, and you let others get the better of you (LoL. I’ve definitely been here before. Shh.)
- You missed a great opportunity because you got scared.
- Or maybe you failed to follow through on an important goal (—mainly because “I cannot comman goan kee maisef).
To quote my mentor, these experiences—especially the lows—shape our lives and can allow us to become better people, if we allow them to. Besides, how sweet will your story be if you didn’t face any obstacles?
Stop being angry with yourself. Stop blaming yourself. Be kind to yourself and resolve to do better from now on.
4. Take Good Care of Yourself.
Ha-ha! “Problem no dey finish” comes to mind—but it’s the truth! The more you grow, the more the responsibilities increase, and the more sacrifices you have to make.
My dad was telling a story the other Sunday. He was explaining how he spent all his hard-earned-sweat-and-blood money on his family—nuclear and extended, with almost little for himself. Then, one day, the job was abruptly taken away from him. He began to be depressed and started thinking about all manners.
And just then, my mum called and noticed his tone and expressions. Initially, he wanted to hide the truth, but immediately decided against it and spilt.
Do you know what my mum told him? That he should immediately enter the shower, take a cool bath and dress up. Then, he should proceed to withdraw the last of his money, go to a fancy restaurant, and enjoy himself. And that’s exactly what he did. Suffice to say that eventually, the job was returned.
My dear, problem no dey finish. Try dey enjoy. Be kind to yourself. Happy Weekend!