The Untrained (A Short Story)

Isn’t it painfully ironic how in our quest to be better parents than our parents, we are unconsciously raising poorly mannered kids?

I encountered a rather badly behaved kid recently. The lad was destructive, rude and didn’t yield to any warning or instructions. He kept making offensive statements to the other kids and they would report to the nearest tutor. However, the more he was cautioned and told to sit quietly, the more defiant he got.

Learning was ongoing as it was an event for children but he was intentionally being a lousy distractor 

He wore a facial expression that says, “I will do whatever I want and there is nothing you can do about it!”  Damn!

I tried to ignore him but the blatant disrespect he was dishing out to the teacher teaching and other adults who were trying to keep him in check was beginning to choke me. Eventually, I had to part my lips and voice out my thoughts.

I beckoned him to me. At first, he was defiant but eventually, he reluctantly obliged. As he stood next to me I asked him if he has ever been spanked, slapped, flogged, or knocked? He parted his lips and formed a crooked smile,  before saying “No.”

I asked him what happens when you do something bad at home? He confidently said, “Nothing happens.” Once again he was smiling crookedly. To confirm his statement I said, “So your parents don’t do anything when you do something wrong?” His reply was, “They don’t do anything. They might only talk to me.”

I nodded my head and said, “Okay.” I understood why when the teacher earlier mentioned that she would report him to his parents, he wasn’t fazed.

Thereafter, with a sweet smile, I informed him how for the first time in his life he will be experiencing what being spanked feels like if he keeps being disrespectful, noisy and badly behaved. He started laughing. Wow! Anyways, I allowed him to finish. 

When he was done, I smiled brightly and with a cool voice, I said, “Please, kindly dare me. Go back to your seat and continue disturbing the learning session. l really want you to learn a very valuable experience from this event so please make sure you make noise. Will you please do that for me?”

For the first time that day, his defiant look faded. He didn’t laugh or smile. He finally got the gist and returned to his seat quietly.  Each time he starts talking he turns to look at me and after meeting my cold gaze, he would immediately hush. The event ended without any drama from his end. 

Well, one of the kids who came to hug me goodbye used the opportunity to inform me that the insolent boy said he hated me. LMAO!

This was one situation where Machiavelli’s position of it was better to be feared than loved was applicable. 

That lad took for granted all the people that came to patronize him and begged him to stay quiet. When I stepped in with a stern approach he had a factory reset.  Dear parents, while simply speaking to your kids when they err is in most cases the better option, it is not always the best option.

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