Dire Consequences of Lacking Self Love.

It is no longer news that Erica has been disqualified from the Big Brother Naija house. In fact, she conducted an interview in which she apologized to the housemates she verbally abused and viewers. However, she maintained that Laycon lied regarding the kissing saga, insisting it only happened once. Some of her fans claim it never happened. Well, from the videos I have seen and his latest diary session, I don’t think he lied. There was just miscommunication.

Who or What is to be Blamed for Her Disqualification. 

Tons of opinions have been aired as regards who is to be blamed for Erica’s qualification. To her fans, Laycon is to be blamed. Some people feel Ebuka is to be blamed. While for some others, Kiddwaya and alcohol are to be blamed. Nevertheless, for Laycon’s fans, Erica was simply self-destructive. 

However, I believe the lack of sufficient self-love was the foundation of her downfall. You must be wondering why I opined that she lacks self-love especially as she was one of the prettiest girls in the house. Actually, behind that pretty face and smile was someone that needs to learn how to love herself wholly. 

Signs of Inadequate Self Love Portrayed by Erica. 

Fear of Being Alone.

Erica even admitted that this was one of her greatest fears. The feeling that she is not sufficient for herself was what led her to pester Laycon to maintain their friendship though he had clearly stated that he needed space.

If she had wholly respected Laycon’s wish and stayed away, that incident he interpreted as an almost-kiss would never have happened. Mind you, it was because she heard from Ebuka that Laycon was telling several housemates she tried to kiss him was what she claimed led to her outrage. She took it too far and got disqualified.

Also, the fear of being alone kept her begging for assurance from Kiddwaya that he was committed to their relationship. Kiddwaya, since the beginning of the show, has maintained that he came to simply have fun. Yet, even with all the red flags, she stuck with him. It is crazy how she kept complaining that he disrespects her, yet she keeps going back to him. Honestly, If you love yourself enough you won’t let anyone keep on disrespecting you

In fact, her first two strikes were all related to him. She got her first strike for whispering to him, and the second strike for sleeping over at the Head of House Lounge with Kiddwaya when she was not his deputy.

If she had loved herself enough, she would have realized she was all she needed, and would not have kept forcing friendship and unrequited love.

Insecurity.

Erica reeked of insecurity and it was painful to watch. Seeing her confronting Wathoni and Nengi over a man that was yet to even confirm that they were in a relationship was painful to watch.

At the beginning of the show, she was glowing. However, as time went by the sparkle left. All thanks to a relationship that left her insecure and in tears several times. Several times she cried over Kiddwaya and promised to stay away from him, yet she kept going back. Frankly, if your self-love is top-notch you won’t keep being with someone that makes you insecure and in tears.

Honestly, I feel her outburst on Saturday was not because of alcohol or Laycon. It was because at the party she saw Kiddwaya with Nengi. She can’t pick a fight with Nengi without looking stupid so she chose to transfer aggression towards Laycon. Her supposed easy prey. Even Dorathy (a fellow housemate) viewed things from this perspective.

It is crazy how she rained insults on Laycon, Prince, and Dorathy. Whereas, the true source of her downfall was right beside her. In the end, as an adult, she was solely responsible for her actions.

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Final Thoughts

I believe upbringing played a great role in the whole situation. I hope she grows to love herself more each day so she can make better choices. Self-love is key. Remember, If you love yourself you won’t let anyone keep on disrespecting you.

Best of luck to her, and I hope we all learn from her situation. 

From all indications, it seems Laycon is winning this show. His team maintained social distancing on the polls.